The Invention of Religion

23 08 2010
Cults and new religious movements in literatur...

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A new blogger arriving on the scene, badcatholic, imagines himself back in time as a fly on the wall during the invention of religion.

Caveman 1: Bro, these mammoths are frightening, and I don’t know why it rains.
Caveman 2: Yeah, sounds like we need some supernatural explanation for natural phenomena for which we are not yet advanced enough to understand.
Caveman 1: Right. So we’ll need a god…
Caveman 2: Nice.
Caveman 1: And let’s have no adultery with beautiful women…
Caveman 2: Uh-
Caveman 1: And in with the concept of eternal, unimaginable torment-
Caveman 2: Slow down-
Caveman 1: And moral obligations, and no more of this survival of the fittest. We’ll not be able to lie, or steal, or cheat, or mastrubate-
Caveman 2: Are you sure you-
Caveman 1: Or eat too much, or drink too much, or be lazy, or be prideful… (source)

It has always fascinated me that atheists repeatedly assert that religion is a human invention, yet a quick study of religious vices and virtues reveals that we’ve set an impossible standard for ourselves. Religions, not just Christianity, speak of the evils of acquiring and hording material possessions, lust, adultery, pride; and extol an others-centered attitude as well as exhorting adherents to not even think about bad things. Religion asserts that humans are broken and need to be fixed, either through a set of ritual behaviors or by a quickening of the spirit by the hand of God, and those who refuse to comply will face eternal destruction, shame, and humiliation. Who would invent that?

On the other hand, if God is the author of religion, that makes much more sense. A divine being who  stands in judgment of humanity warning us against adultery, lust, and evil thoughts makes more sense than a bunch of primitive humans with no motivation to make monogamy the preferred form of marriage, adultery a grave sin, and forbid masturbation and all forms of lust as the standard of behavior.

If mankind invented religion, I think we’d see a much different picture than we do now.


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Categories : Atheism, God, Humor, Religion, Sin, Theology

Animated Mischaracterization of Calvinism

8 08 2010

I read the blog of James White’s sister, Patty Bonds, quite frequently. Through it, I discovered this video. It’s amusing.

Patty feels that it accurately represents Calvinism. She writes:

I was probably one of the most radical Calvinists of all. I would and did stand flat footed and state unwaveringly that all five points of the TULIP were infallible and that those who were not elect were going to glorify God simply by their depraved lives and their eternal damnation. I had also come to the conclusion that even unborn babies that perished were subject to God’s capricious picking and choosing. I had been taught that since it was Tradition that taught us that children were not guilty of actual sin until after an age of accountability that we should reject that idea along with the whole of Catholic Tradition. So if a child was still born, it was entirely up to God whether that child would die with his sinful human nature and suffer damnation for it or if he would somehow become “regenerate” and be saved. If your head is spinning right now, don’t feel alone. I can’t believe I once believed this rubbish either.

So, while Jim’s folks have a cow about this video and bluster about bearing false witness and all, I have to say I found the video not only funny, but also an accurate representation of my own former Calvinist beliefs. I’d say they were also Jim’s but he would just tell me I’m wrong like everyone else is wrong when they find fault in him. Whatever. (source)

Of course, the video does not accurately represent Calvinism. I was toying with the idea of picking through this video and showing how badly it misrepresents Calvinism, but TurretinFan has done that for me. He said everything that I would have said, so enjoy his short but excellent refutation of the video.


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Categories : Apologetics, Calvinism, Heresy, Humor

This is an Interesting Comment

7 08 2010

I’m trying to figure out the meaning of Amos Keppler (@hoodedman)’s Twitter status:

@antitheistangie There is no lack of people criticizing Islam. I see it as my task to be among the few criticizing christianity #atheism (source)

Is this guy on some kind of cool psychedelic drugs? What does he mean to be “among the few criticizing christianity?” Since when is there a shortage of people criticizing Christianity? Every atheist blog I’ve read criticizes Christianity in the bulk of their posts. I assume that the ones I haven’t read do the same (and there are a lot of atheist blogs–the Atheist Blogroll is currently boasting 1,132 members).

Yet, they claim not to be anti-Christian. They claim to be anti-religion. However, even when the chance arises to criticize another religion, they don’t.

In conclusion, this dude needs to get a clue before opening his mouth again.


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Categories : Atheism, Humor, Religion

Because I loved the Commercial. . .

26 07 2010

The commercial reminded me of my brother-in-law. So, even though it makes fun of God, I can’t help myself:

I suppose one could argue that I’m going to hell for blasphemy. Is it wrong for a Christian to find this funny?

HT to Common Sense Atheism


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Categories : Atheism, God, Humor

This Hurt My Feelings

15 07 2010

I scanned my blog stats for yesterday (July 14, 2010) and found out that someone located me by a very unflattering search:

Yes, that’s right: look at the last line. Someone located this blog by searching on the phrase “dumb things on the internet.”

Go ahead, make fun of me. Take your best shot.


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Categories : Humor

New Atheist Graphic

15 07 2010

I just saw the following graphic on Common Sense Atheism. It’s new to me, so forgive me if it’s really old:

This, of course, has it completely wrong. God always was, there was never a time when he didn’t exist. He has existed in eternity before time, before anything else ever was, and that renders the facetious argument of this graphic invalid. He didn’t come from nothing, he never “sprang into being.” He simply existed, always.


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Categories : Atheism, God, Heresy, Humor, Theology

Luke (of CSA) on Kent Hovind

14 07 2010

While I disagree ideologically with Luke of Common Sense Atheism on the problem of evil, he does raise some good points on that post that I probably should address at some point. Specifically, he points out an interesting double standard that Christians have for God’s plan:

In a world so obviously indifferent to our pain or pleasure, Christians must embrace an incredible double standard to believe a God of the universe is perfectly good. They must say that many good things happen because they understand God’s ways and he wanted those things to happen, but they must also say that all bad things happen for reasons we can’t know because we don’t understand God’s ways.

It’s pretty late here, so I’m not going to try to think through Luke’s proposed quandary tonight. Instead, I wanted to agree with Luke on this post about Kent Hovind. Hovind represents the worst of creationist arguments. Even other creationists agree with that. And any academic institution that accepts a Ph.D dissertation with the opening sentence of “Hello, my name is Kent Hovind” should not only be shut down, but burned to the ground.


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Categories : Creationism, Humor

Revelation 3:16 Illustrated

6 07 2010

I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth. For you say, I am rich, I have prospered, and I need nothing, not realizing that you are wretched, pitiable, poor, blind, and naked. I counsel you to buy from me gold refined by fire, so that you may be rich, and white garments so that you may clothe yourself and the shame of your nakedness may not be seen, and salve to anoint your eyes, so that you may see. Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me. The one who conquers, I will grant him to sit with me on my throne, as I also conquered and sat down with my Father on his throne. He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. (Rev 3:15-22)


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Categories : Humor

This Made My Day

6 07 2010


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Categories : Humor

Touchdown Jesus Destroyed!

20 06 2010

Touchdown!

The huge eyesore near Cincinnati, OH nicknamed Touchdown Jesus (since it looks like our Lord is signaling for a touchdown) has been obliterated.

TurretinFan thinks it’s a divine judgment against idolatry. Could be. I just think it’s the result of constructing a gigantic statue out of highly flammable materials and ensuring it is the tallest object for miles around. Great move, guys!

I’m torn as to whether I should wish them the best on their rebuilding efforts, or if I should point out that $200,000 could fund some missionary work.

Extra Crispy!


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Categories : Humor

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